Laidback Gourmet: Haribo Smurfs Gummis

Welcome back to a smurfing edition of the Laidback Gourmet! This week I’m smurfing out completely and taking a looking at smurfing smurf gummis. Yea, I’m going to stop that now.

Giant Smurf is about to attack his friends.

Not much of a story behind these candies. I was at the store the other day and saw these sitting on the shelf, and with an unnecessary sequel to an unnecessary live action smurf movie coming out it seemed like a fitting time. I guess if I had to be honest I’d say I didn’t HATE the first Smurf movie but I can’t say I loved it either. It suffers from what most live action adaptations of cartoons from my childhood suffer from. In theory it’s supposed to be a loving tribute to something you’re nostalgic for from your childhood, but half the movie is spent telling you how stupid the original thing you loved in the first place was. The other half of the movie is usually just a slap dash chopping up of the original material because just because the source material was popular enough to make a movie out of that doesn’t mean it can’t be improved upon by focus groups. That’s why even though you have about a thousand loveable smurf characters that can be used they needed to create their own Gutsy Smurf that sounds exactly like Fat Bastard. Because when you think loveable kids characters, you think Fat Bastard.

Whlie he’s not as bad as Scrappy Doo or the Great Gazoo, he’s a serious contender for my third most hated cartoon character

That’s enough of a movie review though, I’m the food and video game guy on the site. If you want movies, you should go check out the good guys of Forced Perspectives. Particularly the episodes I’m on! In the mean time let’s trek on with our journey into the magical world of gummi art.

Gargamel’s Dream

That’s pretty much all you get in one bag. Not too bad actually but they’re very much out of order. SMURFS… ASSEMBLE!

Look at me, I’m like the Smurf Whisperer over here!

That’s better. Well there’s your problem, Papa Smurf was messing around with duplication magic again! That’s the only explanation why there’d be 4 Papa Smurfs and even more Smurfettes than regular Smurfs. Apparently Papa’s into some kinky stuff. Apparently Smurfs Berry juice IS an aphrodisiac, that must be why Gargamel is always after them. Let’s face it, look at him, he needs all the help you can get.

They really are three apples tall, I just have really giant hands.

As you can see these are mass produced and there’s not a whole lot of care that goes into them. I’m not looking for perfection or anything but Smurfette’s hat is yellow and her hair is blue. That’s simply a case of, “Who cares, fat kids will eat them no matter what.” Well they’re wrong. Fat kids AND internet critics will eat them no matter what! So let’s try them.

Om Nom Nom

Alright, I have to be honest here. I have no flavor what they’re going for. It’s fruity. It’s sweet. And it’s pretty much unidentifiable. Maybe it’s a mix of all the discarded ends of all the flavors mixed with blue dye? The taste is ok, but nothing to scream about. The real issue is that the texture isn’t great, which is often a problem with Harabo gummis. For some reason I always find this brand of gummi to much firmer/harder than your typical gummi. (I’m saying gummi so much I’m waiting for Marge Simpson to yell at me). Final wrap up thoughts, the taste is just alright, the texture is too firm, and Smurfette has a yellow hat on. Gummi Venus Di Milos they are not. Final Score:

Well that concludes this edition the Laidback Gourmet. Thank you as always for reading and as always send all your feedback to my personal email address: Until next time I’m Ed DiFolco, your Laidback Gourmet suggesting that you skip The Smurfs 2 and go watch Felidae instead. (Parental Discretion is advised)

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