In our last exciting installment our culinary hero went to Burger King to try out their newest creation. Not to be outdone, the clown prince of fast food had to throw their squeaky red nose into the ring with a new offering of their own. How will our intrepid hero face the wrath and intensity of the MIGHTY WINGS?
Spicy, Bold Delicious: all things I’ve been called by my lovers
Well now that epic opening is done with, welcome back to the Laidback Gourmet. So there I was, sitting and watching my Giants lose again Sunday afternoon and what did I happen to see? A commercial which surprised me quite a bit. No, it wasn’t the fact that McDonald’s is now offering chicken wings that shocked me. Oh no, its the manner in which they told me about their new product:
Look familiar? Maybe because it’s a carbon copy of a classic awesome advertisement from my childhood perhaps?
See, the thing about carbon copies is that they’re always inferior to the master copy. While the original ad had Larry Bird and Micheal Jordon play an epic game of horse to see who gets to eat a Big Mac, this one has a two quarterbacks who, no offense to them, are nowhere near the same level in their sport as Bird and Jordon was in theirs, play for a serving of MIGHTY WINGS. The original ad was so cool it led to Bugs Bunny eventually being added which led to a movie. The original ad was so cool that it actually led to a movie. I just don’t see the same illustrate future for the new ad. However, with all that being said, the idea of MIGHTY WINGS seemed interesting to I paid the golden arches a visit.
MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER FREE-RANGERS
So there they are. Personally I don’t see anything all that mighty about them. They look like typical fried chicken wings. Actually they look a lot like the fried chicken wings you can get any Chinese take out place. Here’s hoping they taste as good as those because as Barenaked Ladies taught us, you have a drumstick and your brain stops ticking.
…it’s a song, look it up.
That’s actually a fried Turkey Leg, I just have really big hands.
One good thing, as I’m holding it up, they don’t feel particularly greasy. They smell ok, there’s definitely a bit of spice going on here which isn’t surprising. I fully expect these to have a bit of heat to them because why else name them MIGHTY WINGS or give you ranch dipping sauce?
This ranch needs to be about 20% cooler
Let’s give them a shot:
*om nom nom*
Whew, I called that one right. First, the positive stuff. The chicken itself is pretty good. It’s very moist and tender. The crust is nice and crisp without being too greasy. However, all that goes out the window when I say they’re just too hot. Oh, they’re not blazing hot where they’re painful to eat, but the problem is that they are HOT, not SPICY. As I’ve explained before, the difference between hot and spicy is spicy is heat but with flavor whereas hot offers nothing but heat. That’s what these wings come off like. There’s no real flavors going on here other than plain chicken and typical heat. There’s no chipotle or jalapeno or other exotic ingredient that offers a burst of flavor in exchange for a bit of firey pain. To me I always look at heat as a deal with the devil type thing. I offer you my mouth to burn in exchange for a burst of flavor that makes me want to take the heat like a man and go back for another bite because it’s just that darned delicious. With these wings it’s just adding heat to bland basic wings and saying, “Well, that’s probably good enough.” Oh, and one final note, these wings cost me over a dollar a wing, a pretty high price for any wing, particularly wings that were mediocre at best. Apparently the MIGHTY tag was describing the pricetag.
And worst of all, MIGHTY WINGS isn’t even that wacky a name. Final Score:
Well that concludes this rather negative edition of the Laidback Gourmet. The thing is, as a big fan of chicken wings I REALLY wanted to like to these. Oh well, maybe next time I’ll sample something better. Speaking of, if you have any suggestions for what that next thing could be send your emails to SuperfriendEd@Gmail.com. Until next time, I’m Ed DiFolco, your Laidback Gourmet with a little bit of a preview. As I was leaving McDonalds something caught my eye. Apparently they had something else on sale thats a bit more appropriate for the season. What was it? Well stay tuned true believers, same Laidback Time, same Laidback Channel!