Welcome to another edition of the Laidback Gourmet. While Homer Simpson’s vision of the Land of Chocolate may not exist in reality The Laidback Gourmet is about as close as you can get in our mortal world. Today I’ll be trying the Triple Dazzle Caramel Bar:
Nope, not that kind of Dazzle. Today we’re looking at another marvelous creation of the king of candy, Willy Wonka. Obviously we’re dipping into his private stash because this is a “Wonka Exceptional” item.
Now THAT’S a Triple Dazzle Caramel Bar. The wrapper is as epic as the name, just look at the way it shimmers. Also, just look at the text, it has the words “Truly Amazing Chocolate” written right on! Somewhere Augusta Gloop is weeping openly. And tucked inside of that chocolate is caramel mixed with sea salt. Not sure about the salt, but I do love caramel.
This is quite overwhelming. I really think I need a little help with this review, I just don’t feel high brow enough for this. I wonder if my Great Great Great Great Grandfather Edmund Alister DiFolco is about today?
Edmund: “I’m here old boy, I’m here. BY JOVE, just look at the wrapper on that thing. It must contain the lost gold of Hoichu Pichu!”
I know, right? I can only hope what lies on the inside is an impressive as the name and wrapping. Let’s open it up and see what we got.
Edmund: “Would you look at that? It’s like staring into the bloody ark of the covenant! What are those strange markings on it, I wonder?”
Let me carefully lift this bar up and we can get a better look at it. I have to be careful, I wouldn’t be surprised if this thing was booby trapped.
Not only is this chocolate bar quite hefty, but its also quite appealing to the eye. I don’t know why but for some reason the pattern reminds me of something musical. I almost expect that M in the middle to be replaced by a musical note. Of course, I have to wonder, why if this is a Wonka Exception would they use a M as the letter in the middle.
Edmund: “Rubbish dear boy, I think you’re holding upside down. That’s a W.”
Ah. Yes. I knew that. Perhaps the pattern is starting to effect me, maybe I should just remove a piece from the whole and try that.
Let’s give this one a try, shall we? If I waste any more time I might end up being choco-“late”.
Om Nom Nom
Again, I must say “woah.” I didn’t think there was any way for this chocolate to live up to the name and the epic wrapper it’s in, but the taste actually exceeds all the hubbub. This chocolate is literally amazing! You have to try this Edmund!
Edmund: “Ah, no thank you, just take a look at the way the caramel is oozing out. It’d take me a week and two fortnights to get it groomed out of mustache.””
Ah, sorry to hear that because this really is amazing. I questioned the salt but I take back any doubts I had. There’s just the slightest crunch of sea salt that mixes with the sweet of the caramel and just enhances the whole experience. Then you wrap some quality chocolate around the whole thing and you honestly have one of the best candy bars I’ve ever had.
If you forced me to try to find a negative with this chocolate bar it’d be hard for me to do but I’d have to point out the price. At somewhere between $2.50 and $3.00 for a single bar this is one of the pricier chocolate bars you might find at your supermarket, but you know what? I don’t care. Everyone knows me as someone who’s quite frugal, but when it comes to chocolate: you get what you pay for, and this Wonka Bar more than lives up to its price tag. A perfect 10/10 rating this week. Got anything to add to that Edmund?
Edmund: “I have no time for that, boy, now that my Victorian Adventurer blood is all a boil I must go adventuring! I’m off to find the lost gold of Hoichu Pichu! I bid you well!””
And with that… he’s gone. And so am I, cause that concludes this edition of the Laidback Gourmet. I really suggest you go out and try this week’s item it really the best thing I’ve reviewed to date.
Send your emails to SuperfriendEd@Gmail.com or just leave a comment here on the site. Until next time this is Ed DiFolco, your Laidback Gourmet wondering if Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory is up on Netflix streaming yet, I suddenly feel like I want to see it again.