Greetings and welcome back to the Laidback Gourmet. I’d like to start off with some good news! Apparently finally buying the chicken/waffles chip lifted the voodoo curse! (Look for that review next week!) I got my old reviewing table back:
Though I’m starting to wonder if it was just being held hostage by Hired Goons til I reviewed those chips
It’s a really good thing I got my old table back because I’m going old school today! Long time readers of this blog might remember when I first starting doing these here Laidback thingies that I attempted to start something different with the very second LBG I wrote. I was going to try and review as many Dr. Pepper clones as I could. That first one about Diet Dr Dazzle was published on this site back in July of 2010. Now only a mere three years later its time for experiment #2! Seriously, with a name like Dr. Big, how could I NOT pick it up?
The soda for people who need to overcompensate
I think what I love most about all the Dr. Pepper clones out there is the incredible names they give them. Dr. Dazzle was good, but Dr. Big? If I walked up to you and said the name “Dr. Big” to you, what would you think of? You’d either think I was making a phallic reference about myself, naming a character in a porno, or I was talking about some comic book super villain. I think you’d be hard pressed that I was talking about a bottle of soda I picked up at Big Lots for the exorbitant price of 75 cents.
And me with only 74 cents in my pocket
That might seem like pretty cheap but it gets even better because I know this must be a premium product because along with a name like Dr. Big, it has these words written right on the bottle:
If you can’t trust a soda bottle what can you trust?
Crisp AND Refreshing?!? For only 75 cents?!? Why that’s a bargain at twice the price! I think for a drink as fancy as this one I need to break out the good glasses. I think I even need to use some ice and a straw even!
This shot is probably better advertising than this soda ever had.
Eagle eyed readers might notice that I am even using the exact same glass in this review as I did for the original experiment! How’s that for continuity? I’ll just have to make sure I use it again in 2021 when I do experiment #3. I grow weary of this exposition. It’s time for science, commence with the pouring!
I hope you all appreciate that these action pouring shots are actually pretty tricky when it’s only just you pouring and taking the photo.
Well, it smells like Dr. Pepper but there seems to be less bubbles. To be fair, it might have lost a little bit of it’s effervescence sitting on the shelf at Big Lots, however I don’t think it’ll be an issue, it’s still plenty bubbly. Might as well give this one the taste test.
Oh sweet merciful crap. That’s horrible! Apparently out of the choices given earlier Dr. Big is the name of a super villain because only the twisted mind of someone evil could think that this sludge compares to Dr. Pepper in any way shape or form. The soda is tastes very watered down and even worse it leaves a terrible aftertaste in your mouth as if it’s a low quality diet soda. The problem is, Dr. Big isn’t diet, its full sugar so why the hell is it leaving this awful aftertaste? As soon as I am done typing this up I’m going to dump the entire bottle down the drain so it can go to the sewers where it belongs. That being said, it’s still an awesome name, final score:
That ends this diabolic experiment, and that also ends this edition of the Laidback Gourmet. Please send your praise, love, good vibes, and suggestions to SuperfriendEd@Gmail.com. Until next time, I’m Ed DiFolco, your Laidback Gourmet, and I think I’m going to go practice my new pick up line. “Hey baby, I’d be willing to share my Dr. Big with you.” That’s right ladies, this guy here is single, and with lines like that its for good reason! DHLEE!